Allowing space for mistakes and slowing down
The helicopter pitched downward at an alarming rate, the ground rushing to meet us. My grip tightened on the controls as tension mounted in my hands and shoulders. I am behind, I thought, realizing I was losing the battle to salvage a poorly executed maneuver.
Then, my instructor’s calm voice cut through the chaos: “I have the controls.”
With practiced skill, he guided us safely back into the bright sky over Imperial Beach, California. As we climbed away, he didn't bark orders or lecture me on my failure. He simply asked: “What do you think you could have done better?”
Frustrated, my ego a little bruised, I rattled off a laundry list of errors: “I got behind the aircraft. I let the rotor speed get too high. I was out of balance. My airspeed was too fast.”
“Right,” he said, sensing my distress. “Now, instead of trying to make all those corrections simultaneously, how about on this next practice autorotation you just take the first two: add collective and control your airspeed. We’ll take it from there.”
The Danger of the Quick Fix
Reflecting on this over a 25-year career in military aviation and the private sector, I’ve realized a profound truth: In the boardroom, just like in the cockpit, an ego-driven response to a mistake usually leads to "over-correcting"—which often causes more damage than the initial error.
My instructor didn’t provide prescriptive feedback while we were accelerating toward the ground. He knew my cognitive load was already maxed out; adding more instructions would have only caused me to freeze. He only intervened when we were close to being "out of parameters" and unsafe. He gave me the latitude to self-correct until the very last moment.
The Startup Trap: Time-Starved Managers
In the corporate world, I see well-intentioned but time-starved managers doing the exact opposite. Instead of allowing their teams the "altitude" to learn, they provide a constant stream of reflexive, prescriptive corrections.
When a manager "grabs the controls" too early or too often, two things happen:
The team stops thinking: They wait to be told what to do rather than learning to scan the instruments themselves.
Growth is delayed: When feedback is withheld for annual reviews, the "window of opportunity" for learning has long since closed.
While working at a large tech company, I had direct reports who were shocked that I scheduled regular one-on-ones. They were used to a culture where they only heard from a manager when a customer survey was negative or a deadline was missed. Not surprisingly, those cultures are defined by burnout and costly turnover.
Lessons from the After-Action Review
Building a high-performing team requires a manager who is alert to growth opportunities but disciplined enough to stay off the controls. Effective leadership requires:
Defining the Parameters: Be clear about what constitutes "safety" (deadlines, budget, values) and what is a "practice area" (process, creative execution).
Slowing the Thinking Down: When a mistake happens, don't just fix it. Ask the team to pause and reflect on one or two specific adjustments for the next "flight."
Creating a Safe Sky: Intervene only when a situation is headed toward genuine danger. Otherwise, let the team feel the "pitch" of the aircraft so they learn how to level it out.
Conclusion
Aviation taught me that you can't learn to fly if the instructor's hands are always on the stick. The same is true for your team. Are you giving them the space to feel the controls, or are you pulling them out of the sky before they have a chance to learn?
Are you looking to build a culture that allows for mistakes without sacrificing safety? Let's grab coffee and talk about developing your leadership potential.
